she tries to explain to them...

i love when song lyrics speak to me. yes i finally went out & bought the new kenny chesney cd. it's not so much country as really mellow with alot of tropical island feel to it. steel drums & the like. sooo relaxing. i haven't taken it out of my car cd player since i walked out of walmart with it 5 days ago.

as usual, i digress lol.

there are bits & pieces of that whole cd that just touch my musical soul. i am sure they will all surafce here at one time or another but today's lyrics comes from "she's from boston"--and it's not for the obvious reasons that this song fits me in this case. (yes i realize i am not really from boston anyway but it's still new england, still part of where i came from...anyway off on yet another tangent.)

She never really knew how good it would feel
To finally find herself in a place so warm and real
never having set a foot in this state prior to the day i arrived here, i had no idea. sure i miss people & places from CT but i feel like i was born for the warmth & the slowed down pace of the FL lifestyle. even when it's rushed, it's not at that breakneck speed from up north--and i find when it's most rushed down here anyway, it's not by locals, but by tourists, probably those from up north. people down here are different too. they will chat & they are warm. this life feels good to me & i feel like i was meant to take this journey. i've learned alot about myself that i couldn't have discovered without coming here.

The girl she was in New England
Is different now and dead
while i am still me & always will be, i am definitely not the same girl in some very defining ways. i am not under the same sort of pressure to make everyone around me happy at my own expense. i don't feel like i need to impress anyone. i have evolved into someone who is learning to better understand herself & what i want from the world. i won't ever be the same girl i was back then...and i am more than ok with that.

Talks to her family now and then
Through e-mails and postcards
She tries to explain to them...
Her dreams have changed somehow
i know that i will never be able to make them understand how at home i feel here. i miss them. i wish there was a way to make the distance less & see them more but just as they aren't really wanting to relocate to FL, this is home to me & i am happy here. i can't explain to them why because i guess i *should* want to be close to those most important to me but how do i tell them that i still am in the ways the truly matter. and as much as no one who knew me before would have ever guessed that i would even consider moving 1200 miles away from where i grew up, let alone be happy & content here, this has been good for me. i may want different things than i did & i may be a different version of myself, but i am still their dawn...just a little further way & with a bit more confidence in myself to be ok out on my own.

Her toes dig deep and deeper in the sand
She's seduced by the sunsets and her new life at hand
i may not be on the beach all that much but i am digging in deep & deeper here. i have a hard time imagining myself anywhere else. even when the darn hurricanes huff & ouff & try to blow my house down. i *am* seduced by the sunsets--i've never seen anything like them here in FL. and i am captivated by so much of the peaceful tropical beauty that surrounds me. i miss autumn in new england & white Christmases...but there is just something about this area that has me hooked. and i can't wait to see where this new life will bring me next...

guess i just need to remind you all that you *can* come down & visit me here!

=)
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side note: new pictures of sweet Catherine to share when i get home tonight!!!
*big happy grin*