This Week on My TV: March 22, 2014

Disclaimer: Some shows I watch live and with others, I tend to be fairly behind on my tv watching. Even so, consider the fact that there could be spoilers ahead. All I can do is lead in with the show and episode. You read at your own risk!



**(Grey's Anatomy, S10E14 "You've Got to Hide Your Love Away") ::snort:: Weber just called HR's new "non fraternization" policy "The Panty Police." And then Owen made Weber the chief of police. Oh, Grey's you slay me. -- All the best fights (or "fights") take place in the gallery over the lobby of the hospital. It's tradition. -- Love: Jackson and April revealing their marriage. Mer torturing Derek because she's mad he is putting his opportunity over her turn to advance her career, but putting her frustration on hold for some "husband wife time." Don't love: Callie and Arizona and that ring. Cristina and Own...*again*. Stephanie and Leah acting like immature little brats.

**(Parenthood, S5E16 "The Enchanting Mr Knight") How do tv couples always wake up to the most amazing morning light ever? -- It cannot possibly be as easy at Sarah and Carl made it look to just "go with me to Africa." Even if Sarah, who, let's face it, is never the most organized adult, has a valid current passport, doesn't she have to get a bunch of vaccinations and stuff? -- How long before Jasmine and Crosby end up living in Zeek and Camille's house while they go traveling or whatever it is Camille "needs to do"? -- I like Kristina's shorter hair curly more than I do straight. -- I'm going to say it. I don't care for Natalie all that much. She is only interested in Drew because Amy is there, not because she actually wants anything with Drew. -- Ha! Crosby listening at the vent to his parents fighting. -- Part of me is proud of Sarah for staying focused on her career and not running off with some guy, but...is she finally giving up the good guy? Arg. Fictional life is obviously just as complicated as real life. -- Tears: Kristina getting the phone call that her one-year cancer scan came back clear. Kristina and Adam were perfection in that scene. Actually they were perfect in the doctor's office scenes too.

**(Chicago Fire, S2E16 "Rocket Blasting Off") ::slaps forehead:: A surprise vasectomy as an anniversary gift, Hermann? Really? (Although I have to admit I am amused that his wife *loved* the gift.) -- Boy, when you ask a buddy if he needs anything, you don't really expect that he's going to say "yeah, lie to the cops for me," huh, Joe? -- I think I'm supposed to feel bad for Jones because her father doesn't want her to be an active firefighter but...I don't really care. -- D'oh. Did Daddy Severide make Keeler disappear?? -- I feel like that keychain Benny Severide was playing with at the bar after he apparently confessed to Voight was supposed to mean something but I can't think of what that might be.

**(Once Upon a Time, S3E12 "New York City Serenade") That was some terrible CGI of the magic/broken curse rolling through Fairy Tale Land toward Aurora and Phillip. -- Emma: You're a crazy person or a liar. Or both. Hook: I prefer dashing rapscallion. Scoundrel. -- What does it say about me that when Emma's boyfriend proposed and she ran out on him, I was immediately suspicious about how understanding he *really* was about it? -- It bugs me that Snow White's "royal hair" is so rat's-nesty. Shouldn't she own a royal comb or something? -- That was a really good speech Snow made to Regina about keeping her heart and finding a way to be happy. -- Oh good. Just what my inner child needed: a revisit from the winged monkeys of Wizard of Oz fame. -- I feel your pain about the bologna they force fed you in jail, Hook! -- "Walsh" was really a winged monkey in disguise? Yeah, actually, I could see that. Nice work, casting! -- Holy time travel, Batman. I had a really hard time keeping up with the passage of time in this episode. And why the residents of Storybrooke are not still in Fairy Tale Land where we last left them. Or was that the curse/danger about which Hook was trying to warn Emma?

**(Blue Bloods, S4E17 "Knockout Game") The "knockout game" footage was *really* difficult to watch. Especially when you consider this actually happens. It's twisted. -- After about 90 seconds, Danny's CI referring to himself in third person lost its charm. -- Wow, it's not very often that you see Frank annoyed with Baker. Garret, all the time, but never Baker. -- I was just commending Danny and Baez for thinking to park their car right outside the backdoor when they went looking for a suspect, in case he ran (which of course he did), when suddenly Danny employs some interesting interrogation techniques, like stuffing the suspect in the trunk and driving around like a maniac, until he cried "uncle." I miss the Danny Reagan slap in the head though. -- Everyone knows something is amiss when Danny isn't scarfing down his meal at family dinner! -- Erin and Jack?! It's a good thing she "pressured" him into showing his true colors before they made the mistake of letting Nicky in on their secret. ::shudder:: He is slimy. -- We did have one question though: how was the orange paint on the sole of Mike's boot *still* wet long after Danny left the house and Mike's wife went to bed, then he got in the car, drove to the drug dealer's neighborhood, he watched him make a deal, then followed him into an alley for a confrontation? Shouldn't it have been dry by then or at least tracked off to the point that it wasn't leaving clear prints on the ground?

**(Elementary, S2E17 "Ears to You") I hate when someone leaves severed *ears* on my bar! Major *yuck*. -- Mildly interesting case, somewhat interesting twist with the ex-wife growing ears on her back to deceive her ex-husband into a ransom. But mostly this Lestrade arc isn't really holding my attention much.

**(How I Met Your Mother, S9E21 "Gary Blauman") Awww, Ted and The Mother's first date! -- Not a fan of Robin's wedding dress. --  I may or may not be the nerd who looked to see if the Theodore Roosevelt book with which Ted was obsessed was a real book. -- Ted: So it was a bad breakup? The Mother: Real bad. Ted: Bad, like there was a big fight? The Mother: Bad, like there was a big ring. Ted: Bad, like this happened in the past year? The Mother: Bad, like it happened Saturday. Ted: So...bad. -- I wish there were ways I could work this quote into regular conversation! ... Lily: Point comma get to the damn. -- The slow motion close up of Gary Blauman eating Barney's accidental curly fry was gross -- I loved the future peeks on Carl the bartender, Janette the psycho, Kevin the therapist, Ranjit, Patrice, Nilly Zabka, Zoe, Scooter, Lily's stripper doppelganer, Blahblah Carol, Sandy Rivers, James and Tom. I loathe dangling threads and I think that covered them all! -- Ted: You will be shocked, kids, when you discover how easy it is in life to part ways with people forever. That's why, when you find someone you want to keep around, you do something about it. -- That first kiss between Ted and The Mother was perfect. Tentative and that little bit awkward that comes from not knowing the other person's "moves" yet, but so sweet. And then Ted just staring at her and when she asks him what he's doing, he replies, simply "Remembering this." Oh my heart.

**(2 Broke Girls, S3E19 "And the Kilt Trip") All I can say about that abomination is even Sophie couldn't save it.

**(Mike and Molly, S4E13 "Three Girls and an Urn") I'm not sure how I would feel about Kathy Bates gnawing on my armpit! LOL -- Florida: Mickey Mouse, meth and mullets. ... Sadly, more true than I might hope.-- Mike [about his mother]: Why do you think that house across the street goes up for sale once a year? Molly: I thought it was black mold. Mike: *She's* the black mold!!

**(Revolution, S2E16 "Exposition Boulevard") I am not a fan of seeing the insides of eyelids. -- Apparently saying the numbers tattooed into the lower lids of the recruits makes them go nut-so. I can't believe that girl shot her father and then slit her own neck. This show can be so twisted. -- I am trying to imagine what it would be like for soldiers on Guantanamo to look out their window and see a bunch of old ships sailing up, carrying a large portion of the U.S. government. -- I suspect there will be some problems for Tom now that Doyle has activated Jason. -- What. Just. Happened. With. Priscilla.

**(The Blacklist, S1E16 "Mako Tanida") Jolene is trouble. I wonder what message she was sending Tom by showing up at his house and hanging out with Lizzie? -- Profoundly moving scene ... Red: Searching in the desert for a drop of vengeance to slake an unquenchable thirst is a lonely walk, my friend....Donald, I understand how you feel, Beneath the iron and rust exterior, beats the heart of a man swimming in immeasurable grief. I am truly sorry about Audrey. There are few understand love and loss more than I....Let me tell you something that someone much wiser than I told me at a similar point in my life: Go home. Turn back from this, go home. It may seem like the hardest thing in the world, but it is profoundly easier than what you're contemplating. Ressler: I'm not turning back. Red: That's pretty much what I said....Agent Ressler, once you cross over, there are things in the darkness that keep your heart from ever feeling the light again. Ressler: All I feel is hate. Red: Good. You're gonna need it. -- Whoa. Tom is apparently far more badass than I would have expected, what with those doe eyes and the dorky glasses. And obviously far more dangerous. What is going on in that warehouse? And who the heck does he work for?! And how will they feel about the fact that he offed Jolene? -- Because I needed to feel more sad for Ressler, he had to find his murdered girlfriend's pregnancy test? At least he got the head-in-the-box consolation prize from Red...  -- These snippets of details we get of Red's family are killing me. I want to know what became of them! I mean, Red bought his old house just to blow it up. He commissions an entire ballet to give him a private performance of Swan Lake once a year. What on earth happened to them? -- Speaking of killing. Totally creepy that Lizzie gets in the shower with Tom and his bloody hands!

**(The Mentalist, S6E14 "Grey Water") I'm thinking that hiding behind a pantry door when someone is shooting at you is probably not the safest place, Rigsby. Pretty sure those bullets can go through thin wooden doors. -- Where is Rigsby's son? They only ever mention or show his baby daughter with Van Pelt now. I thought the boy's mother was in prison...? (I guess they answered that question, sort of, later in the episode, but it was still weird up to that point.) -- I've missed the interaction between Rigsby and Cho. I'm glad Rigsby is consulting with the FBI on this former-CBI-agent murders case. -- I startled so violently when that shadowy figure emerged behind Van Pelt that I made myself laugh. And I had *just* said to T that we were going to see a shadow go by the window! I wonder what's going to happen to her.

**(Mom, S1E19 "Toilet Wine and the Earl of Sandwich") I've said it before, I'll say it again: I hate that they made Nathan Corddry's character such an unlikable little weasel. -- Bonnie: You do know that he wasn't in the area on business, right? Christy: I know. Bonnie: And it doesn't bother you that your father's a liar? Christy: My mother managed a whore house in Calgary. It takes a lot to disappoint me. -- Violet can be a snot. She has a point many times, but she is a snot nonetheless. -- Do they really allow a group of friends to drive someone to prison? -- Regina: But I'll be late turning myself in! Christy: What are they going to do? Throw you in jail? -- Did Violet get more pregnant between lunch and the conversation on the couch? What the heck was in that sandwich?!

**(About a Boy, S1E4 "About a Girl") Fiona is the kind of woman that would drive me crazy, if I actually knew her. -- OMG! Marcus finally had a scene where he didn't wear a hat!

**(Once Upon a Time in Wonderland, S1E10 "Dirty Little Secrets") Cyrus back story this time. I like learning character history. -- The Jabberwocky is a ridiculous amount of creepy. -- Is the Red Queen *really* turning over a new leaf? I am skeptical. -- Cyrus's mother is Amara, Jafar's mentor in sorcery! Nice twist.

**(The Good Wife, S5E14 "A Few Words") When did Cary go from annoying to actually likable? It totally happened without my noticing! -- I enjoyed seeing what was happening with Alicia just prior to the show starting. Character history is often one of my favorite parts of a show: the history we didn't see because it "happened before the show began." I love seeing how far Alicia, one of my favorite females characters on tv right now, has come since the series premiere. And she is still recognizable. Proof of excellent and relate-able character development. -- That whole exchange between Elsbeth Tascioni and Nelson Dubeck (the guy investigating Peter and harassing Will) was such fabulous comic relief. Elsbeth would have fit in perfectly on Boston Legal. She is quirky but so flipping smart. I love it.

**(Person of Interest, S3E17 "/") Weirdest episode title ever. -- How come Mr Reese wasn't affected by the tear gas Root left behind for the four Vigilance goons coming for this week's number? -- Did Fusco just call Root "Cocoa Puffs"?? -- Fusco [to Reese]: She had a warrant. A *real* one. What was I supposed to say? Agent King is actually a superpowered nut ball. Just ask my buddy, the urban legend. -- Root is almost as badass Mr Reese. -- I cringed exactly the same way Finch did when Shaw went to pour alcohol on her wound. -- Fucso's contempt for Root gives him the opportunity for some of the best lines in this show.

**(Reign, S1E14 "Dirty Laundry") Shouldn't Mary and Francis have been traveling back from their honeymoon in a sleigh, not a carriage, given all the snow on the ground? -- I audibly gasped when Henry accidentally(?) pushed the Archduke of Bohemia's sister out the window during their tryst. -- Lola is pregnant with Francis's baby?! -- Oh the humor of watching Catherine and Henry attempting to dispose of a body on their own. -- Good grief, Henry is depraved. -- What on earth happened to Olivia after she left French Court?!

**(Law and Order: SVU, S15E18 "Criminal Stories") I can't decide which Reverend is more obnoxious: this one or the one on Blue Bloods. -- Hate crime episodes are done so frequently now that they lose some of their effect. -- What a surprise that Alec Baldwin acted like a jerk. (Acted? Hmmm.)