except it was probably more like the Early American pioneers, because, you know, cavemen wrote on walls.

nothing like a rude awakening on what should be your vacation day to lead off a long weekend.

6am. i am suddenly startled awake. i assess, as best i can with my bleary brain, trying to determine the cause. internal alarm clock thinking it is a work day? no, i would have gone right back to sleep the instant i remembered i am off today which took me approximately point three seconds to recall. body done sleeping? most emphatic NO. bad dream? no, i am not rattled, scared or sad, my heart rate is normal, i am merely awake & confused how i became so. loud noise? no, it is quiet... hmmm... eerily *silent*. i blink a few times & then the remainder of fog clears from my head (great, now i am completely awake) and i realize... the power is out, just gone out actually, as my focusing eyes see the blades on the ceiling fan above me slowing to a halt. silence really *is* deafening.

as much as i love quiet, the peace that comes from stillness, you don't truly grasp how your brain recognizes silence, not as absence of sound, but as background noise you don't actually pay attention to as you go about your day, until all the sounds you are accustomed to STOP abruptly. the soft whir of fans in various pieces of technology. the white noise of the ceiling fans steadily spinning round and round. the occasional hum of air & the hushed clicks from the air conditioner as it kicks on & off. the ever-present multitude of noises made by the world's loudest refrigerator. all... mute. my soundtrack is now limited to half a million frogs peeping from the pond (S&TC fans will appreciate this as being much like the scene where Carrie sleeps at Berger's for the first time & he turns on the sound machine) -- oh how i love you now lush landscaping in my apartment complex! (/sarcasm born of being yanked out of blissful sleep) -- punctuated by the chirp from my hard-wired smoke detector, informing me roughly every two minutes that it has no power source.

keep in mind that i live in Florida. and it is mid-July. and my environment is no longer climate-controlled. (starting to understand why Dawn does *not* entertain even the notion of anything remotely resembling camping?) it's already getting hot in here (and the sun isn't even up yet). i would open a window, but i would probably drown in the 140% humidity. not to mention, the frogs? it was as if someone had hit the mute button on my world & cranked up the volume on the pond to maximum. (did someone move the pond to directly outside my bedroom window or something?! because seriously, the frogs sound like they are living in my head, they are so LOUD!!! it's 6am! keep that racket down, would ya?!)

so i do what any 21st century girl does when she has no power at 6am on a vacation day: i pick up my cell phone, post a whiny update to Twitter, and then text my only friend guaranteed to be not only up, but coherent at this hour, to lament my situation. (thanks, Michelle!)

Good Friend that she is, she does the thinking for me (see, i am just enough awake now that there's no chance of me getting back to sleep even if the power comes back on that very instant, but not enough awake to think anything even closely resembling productive) and suggests i call the power company to see if they have a status recording or to report the outage if they don't.

dilemma: i do not know the number to my power company. i have no internet on which to look it up. and while i have my cable provider programmed into my cell phone (priorities, people! cable company provides tv, internet & telephone! must not be stranded without them!), i do not have the power company listed in my contacts (i do now, by the way, in case you're wondering). Good Friend Michelle looks the information up for me.

i call Local-Power-Provider Electric. they ask for my phone number associated with my account. it has to be my cell number because when i set up my electricity, i didn't have a landline yet. my cell was the only number i had. i enter it. i am told that number is not on file, please enter my account number. see where this is going? i am signed up for paperless billing. i do not know my account number without looking it up online, which normally? not a problem. now? is quite the catch-22. automated telephone system unceremoniously disconnects me because i could not provide the necessary code for assistance.

sigh.

now it's hot in here & i am bored (no offense, Michelle, i promise). i never appreciated just how dark my apartment is when i sleep. even as the sun is rising, my apartment stays almost pitch black, thanks in part to the fact that it faces southwest (are you impressed i know that? i am!) and also has two enormous trees directly in front of it, providing shade from the sun. i could shower, but it would be in total darkness in my windowless bathroom. i could read, since of course i have half a million candles & a flashlight (hello! land of the hurricane! i am prepared!) but i feel like i should save those resources for when i may actually *need* them. Michelle suggests venturing forth with Lappy...ahem, the laptop (sorry, we are affectionate, the laptop & i) in search of free WiFi, but i look like Medusa, and while i could successfully shower in the absolute darkness, there is no chance of makeup application without light and i will not even tell you what happens to my hair without a hair dryer, especially when we factor in the humidity. i am officially on house arrest.

so what do i do? i move out to my living room, where it is marginally cooler for some reason, turn my arm chair around to face the window, in an effort to utilize even the vaguest bit of daylight. and i start to document my morning. just for you. on a pad of paper with a pen. just like the cavemen blogged way back in the days of yore & yesteryear.

don't you feel special?

yes, the power is back on now (obviously or you wouldn't be treated to this [insert important breaking news interruption-of-your-regularly-scheduled-programming music from your news source of choice here] update on my morning such as it rudely began when i should have been able to stay in bed, slumbering, past 6am) and i un-Medusa-ed myself immediately since i want to be able to escape from my home should my electricity fail again.

silver lining: at least i didn't wake up at 6am, faced with the futility of making myself presentable for work sans electricity.

ever your eternal optimist.