It Crossed My Mind: July 23, 2010

**I know many women who go through four dresses and/or six pairs of shoes when getting ready in the morning. Me? I tried on three Sox shirts before settling on the one I wanted to wear today. I'm holding onto my Girl Card. But just barely.

**Sometimes it hits me again, out of nowhere, just how awesome my life is, how filled to brimming with blessings that I cannot possibly deserve, and it makes it hard to breathe. That level of gratitude is a "burden" I will gladly bear.

**I was a hurtin' puppy last night. I just could not stay awake for another West Coast 10pm start. Well, I was there for the start. Just not past the third inning or into the 13th. I drifted off, wearing my Pedey t-shirt & my present-for-every-single-game Believe bracelet. It appears that while I slumbered, the Red Sox bullpen once again conspired to take a respectable lead & turn it into a soul-crushing loss. I'm glad that the Red Sox bats refused to go silently into that good night, because *man* did we need a win.

**I may never be caught up on my Google Reader again. I'm still trying. So if you can't remember the last time I commented on your blog, I apologize, but I *am* reading, just very (very) far behind, and silently. Sorry.

**Sometimes I think too much.

**I forgot to bring the mayo for my lunch today. That chicken sandwich would have been mighty dry, if it weren't for someone willing to grab some for me when she goes out to get her own lunch today. Whew. Crisis averted. (My problems are monumental, huh?)

**In relation to my second point, I look at how amazing my life is, how lucky I am...and then I look around me. It seems as though there are heavy clouds surrounding so many people who are important to me. I don't know how to help. I don't know how to ease the weight for them. I almost feel guilty for having so much wonderful & being so cheerful when they have to work hard just to paste on a smile. The only thing I can do is try to shine a little of my sunshine through the clouds until they have their own again. But it's so difficult to watch people you care about hurting.

**I do not like being told that I must like every guy who puts on a Red Sox uniform, simply because he wears our laundry, or I'm a bad fan. It doesn't work that way. I was likely the only Sox fan *anywhere* who didn't hate Eric Gagne long before he made his exit. So if there's a player in Boston that I just don't care for? I'm pretty sure I've paid my dues. I don't boo my team (ever, not even Lugo) & I appreciate every contribution made by any guy on our roster. But that does not mean I am an not entitled to lack affinity for a particular player or not really care if he finds himself putting on a different uniform in the future. Even if he might be a really nice guy in his street clothes.

**I've gone back in time & have been re-watching some old school Grey's. Popped in my DVDs of Season One a couple of weeks ago. Just finished Season Two. I'm really enjoying the bonus features too. I usually forget they exist on tv show season DVDs. I've found some great interviews, a tour of Seattle Grace & some unreleased scenes. And that's just in two seasons! I love me some Grey's. Even when it makes me cry.

**I should point out that I haven't loved a show *this* much since Friends. That's saying something. There are plenty I really enjoy a lot, but very few are deemed Forever Favorites.

**Today is my official six year anniversary for my job. (I have an unofficial anniversary because I started here as a temp in April. I wasn't made permanent until July.) Six. Years. That both impresses me (longest time I've been with a single employer) and worries me (I have an infamous history of "expiring" after six years in...other life situations).

**I mentioned, earlier this week, that I happened upon a preview of the menus for this year's Epcot Food & Wine Festival. I may or may not have already started my list of things I want to try. Maybe I should point out: It doesn't start til October 1.

**I love daydreams. The "What If" game. Only good.