Action Series: February 5, 2010

a preface: when i was contemplating the framework for The Broken Road, Version 2010, i decided to challenge myself with approaching my posts from a couple of new angles. Monday's Stream of Consciousness theme was one; Friday's "Action Series" was another. i created a long list of action words (i am open to suggestions if anyone has any!) and my plan was to choose one each week & see where my thoughts took me. i honestly have no idea how this will play out--maybe i'll hate it, maybe it will be a raging success, maybe it will flop--but i'm going to give it my best shot & see what happens with it.

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taking.

there are so many directions this one could go. for instance, we can take a new direction. we can take from another person--of their material goods, their emotions, their energy, their graciousness. we can take a photo. we can take a leap of faith. but the first place my mind went this morning, when i selected the action 'taking' at random, was: taking the time.

sometimes, too often really, i think we don't take the time. we don't take it for ourselves when we need it, but we also don't take it for each other. i don't mean in the "long term commitment" sort of way or in a time of crisis. i think we don't take the opportunities that present themselves when it would cost just a few minutes. we get busy. we get selfish. we underestimate the impact of just a few ticks on the clock & an ounce of effort.

taking a few minutes to listen when a friend just needs to talk about the heap of little things that have piled up on their shoulders & providing the relief of unloading them to an attentive ear.

taking a moment to pay an sincere compliment, to tell someone you like their new hair style or that they look nice today. that doesn't even require missing a step. and so often we think these things to ourselves when, with minimal additional effort, we could let the words come out of our mouths.

taking a few seconds to say the words. thank you. i appreciate what you do for me. i love you. i miss you. i enjoyed spending time with you. you make me happy. i'm proud of you. i noticed.

i've tried to be aware, recently, of actively taking the time. to listen. to spend time with those i love. to form a thoughtful reply, in place of a quick "canned response." to give my attention. to say "hey, i noticed."

we do a lot of taking--intentionally or subconsciously--because i think we are, by nature, selfish beings. it's easier to take for ourselves, and it requires an effort to balance the taking we do with giving back. "taking the time" is one of the few instances in which the taking is not self-centered and the cost is negligible. i think we underestimate how much those few moments we take from ourselves can brighten someone's day, bolster them when they most need it, make them feel special & loved. some of us are more prone to "taking the time" by nature--we all know someone, or if we're lucky, several someones, who regularly make that effort--but those same people will also tell you that they could always take more opportunities than they do. that's the nice thing about taking the time: the more you do it, the easier it gets, and the better you feel for having done so. the more conscious i am of taking the time, the more i realize how many opportunities have passed me by. i am determined to see more of them, to make it a priority to take the time before the time runs out.